Thursday, February 25, 2016

Mask

Mask
2/25/2016

What kind of Mask - do you put on?
What kind of Mask - have I?
And is it a Mask an observer
Could easily push aside?

It is -- you say? How charming.
Do you -- Honestly -- believe that's so?
I find your argument - lacking --
Because of the things I know.

My Mask is - one of Smiles -
It doesn't often crumble away.
I often push aside my Hurt,
This Mask I wear everyday.

The casual observer won't notice,
Or even - Care - to look.
And even the ones' I Love the most --
My pain most overlook.

So don't tell me your mask is obvious,
Stop -- Lying -- to yourself --
Because it hurts and hurts and nothing works --
And it further wounds your soul -

A Good Story

A Good Story
1/31/2016

Truly, the thing I love the most
Is a story.
A story well told -
Something few really appreciate --
Life stories
Are the things I love the most.
A life story is a sad thing to lose --
Pass it down,
Send it on,
So it won't be lost.
So tell me a good story -
One with hurt,
Pain,
Joy,
Laughter,
Love,
Sadness,
Anger,
Fear --
So I have a good story
And a piece -- of you --
After you leave.

The Storyteller - Lost History

The Storyteller - Lost History
2/25/2016

The Story of a person's life
Is honestly quite -- fleeting.
How easy it is to misplace or lose
To not find again - completely.

Though other's know -- small pieces
And parts of another's - life,
That is all --- just a chunk
Of someone else's strife.

Though we can shift through the dirt -
Dig through -- the memories
Trying to fit pieces together
In a single - crafted - story,

Like archaeologists -- we guess
Upon the meaning of the pottery.
A crucial piece is missing --
Our guesses are mere snobbery.

The other's thoughts are replaced,
We can only - guess - at what
Someone else may be thinking
And the - truth - of the matter is
That that really isn't adequate.

The Storyteller of that life is
The only - one - who can make it clear,
With no pieces missing, or shattered,
So we can hold that loved one dear.

The person who truly -- lived it --
It must be them - the Storyteller.
Because honestly who else can supply
A clear and detailed picture.

And without that precious knowledge
Of who you are and were - those left
Must uproot the flowers you planted
To find the remains you kept.


In Loving Memory of my Grandmother who recently passed away.

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

The Rope

The Rope
12/9/2015

Life is a rope, long and harsh
      That we hang on,
             cling to,
                     dangling
                          as we fall,
                                spinning
                                      and twirling
                         as we tumble down
                    the  cliff side
               bouncing
         and rebounding
   as we fall toward the bottom.
Sometimes
the rope gets stuck
and you dangle
   before the rope
        untangles
              and you free fall
                        once more.
                              Sometimes
                              You
                              Fall
                             Straight
                             To
                             The
                             Bottom
                         But
                     Chances are
                 It takes some time
             and you end up
          swirling
                 and twirling
                          and you rebound
                                  before you
                                           finally
                                                reach
                                                   the rock
                                             hard
                                        bottom.
                                    But--
                           look at it this way.
                    No matter how you
              reach
      the bottom
You still have the rope.

Sunday, October 18, 2015

We Discontent Ourselves

We Discontent Ourselves
10/12/2015

We sow the seeds of our discontent
Because life is what we make it.
When you suffer, when you get hurt
When you fall into that bottomless pit
It can be hard to claw your way back up
And continue on after that perilous fall,
Being blinded by the blackest night
Is a feeling that happens to all
That may have the unfortunate fate
To be pulled into such terrible trauma.
You may feel broken and warped
Like your insides are being gnawed on by piranhas.
Though that feeling is hard to get past
And it may feel like you'll never be well,
If you stew in the hate, and wallow in pain
And you never breach that veil
Of horrible agony, you will never be happy.
You'll find yourself suffering through hell
But really, the truth of the matter you need to admit,
The truth that after much pain I choose to tell
Is that you put yourself there, because life is what you make it
And the sooner you realize that you need to get past
The built up feelings that bring you down
The less time the hurt will last.
I am in no way saying it will be easy
Or that it won't take a great deal of time,
But the longer you wallow, the longer it takes
And that is the cruelest of crimes
That you can commit against yourself, and your life.
You must work past the pain to once again be joyous,
Letting yourself move on with your journey
And no longer feeling helpless,
Moving past the pain will bring you light
Making it possible to reconnect
With the world around you and those you love
And though there really is no correct
Way to get past it all, if you only wallow in pain
And misery, what is there left of a life
For you to live, what is the point
When you only succumb to the strife?
Now this may sound like a good reason
To die and let yourself wither away,
But that's not the case, and it can't erase
The hearts that you may have swayed.
There are people you hurt in your own pain
And even if there aren't any people left
You are pushing away the life you could have
And making yourself depressed.
You are perpetuating the pain they gave you
And making yourself stay estranged
From the world around you with so much that's new
And I'm begging you to try and change,
To change in a way that's better
So that the souls of black don't win.
It will be hard but it can get better
So don't wallow in pity, and hurt those around
You who had nothing to do with it
Don't wrestle their hopes to the ground.
Then you are as bad as those who hurt you
And you perpetuate the cycle
Of abuse and hate, the pain, the ache,
The truth of this is vital.
So for yourself and those around you
Move past the horrible pain
Because you can change, and for the better
And the truth cannot be contained.

Sunday, October 11, 2015

Delicate China Doll

Delicate China Doll
10/10/2015

I am a - delicate- china doll
And you have no idea how - disturbing -
It is to sit on a - cushioned - shelf
And watch - silently the culminating
Effort - of those working - hard
On projects around me,
While - incapable - I perch
Up on high - to see -
And record - in my thoughts - what
Others do - and achieve.
But I am - not - free to try
My own ideas of which I conceive
Of - little projects they - may - seem 
But like an ephemeral cloth - I am fragile,
And though I try my best to hold onto strength,
Using this porcelain body - is futile.
So instead I watch - patiently,
Waiting for the day - when maybe
My body will no longer - of china - be made
And I can finally be - free -
To do as I wish-
And move - as - I - like
And fight - my own - fight
And lose - this perpetual - anguish.

Friday, October 2, 2015

Mutual Nerdiness

Mutual Nerdiness
10/2/2015

Let's have fun in our mutual nerdiness
There are so many things that we can do,
Things that other people scoff at
But that decision, one day they will rue
Because we can be strong, mighty warriors
With swords of steel and heavy armor
Swinging away at orcs and goblins
Or you could always be the stealthy archer
Standing in the back waiting for your turn
To fight against whatever evil creature
Comes to stand (quite stupidly) in our way,
But what can I say, I'm a dreamer.
To live in a fantasy world is the way I am
But there are other games that we can play,
So many card games and board games,
There's just to much to do in one day.
There are movies and shows that we can watch
So much more amusing than watching sports,
Doctor Who, Battlestar, X-files, Ancient Aliens,
And other science fiction of various sorts.
But we can't forget anime of different kinds
Fun things like Ouran or Darker Than Black,
Things other people scoff at and think are weird,
Things other people make fun of and attack.
So let's just say, that out of the things we can do
It's probably a good thing I can't learn real spells
Because they'd run out of luck (or maybe health)
And I'd probably put them through hell.
But the best thing in the world that we can do
Is to hang out in our mutual nerdiness
To sip on our tea (or alcohol)
And on that the vote is unanimous.