Words of Others

Words of Others

3/31/2011

The truth of the matter

That others can observe

Is that even when I’m silent

I keep my precious words in reserve.

Speaking doesn’t come that easy

So I’ll wander through my mind

And I listen oh so quietly

And see what I can find.

The words of others echo

In circles in my head,

The fear that I won’t get them out

And the fear that they won’t be read.

So obvious, so plain in me

The things that I can feel,

I carry close this empathy,

Others emotions I conceal.  

Words Hurt

Words Hurt

10/7/2014

Words hurt.

You can try to deny it but if I told you how

Ugly

And worthless you are

It would hurt.

More so if you care about me and my opinions.

If I am a peer,

A coworker,

A friend,

A daughter,

A lover,

My words could do catastrophic damage.

I could tear out your soul and crush it in my fist.

You’d claim you’re okay, that “sticks and stones, man.”

But inside you’re still bleeding.

Denying it doesn’t change a thing.

Doesn’t change the fact that words

Are like spider webs.

They stick to the corners and won’t go away

Because every time you clear them

The spider comes back and rebuilds.

The web is still there.

The threads interweave through the recesses of your mind and the first time I say something harsh and cruel

It sticks

And it stays,

And it reverberates through your mind.

Each time you clear it, it may move back, further in your mine, but that doesn’t change the fact that

It’s

Still

There.

Waiting for you to remember and hurt all over again.

Physical wounds hurt

But with time they fade

And you forget.

I have scars that I don’t remember where they came from.

But when my heart hurts, it hurts for a long time.

For years

Decades

My whole life.

Going to college and being an English major,

A writer,

A poet,

I know the value of picking the right words and which emotions they invoke.

Words have power.

Words have strength.

You can deny it all you want

But it

Changes

Nothing.

Words still hurt

And you cry inside like a child who knows just what words can really do.

Bullies take advantage of this deception.

You try so hard to pretend like it doesn’t hurt

Until it’s too late

And the pain in so vast that even the ocean can’t hold it

And you drown.

You sink to the very bottom of the abyss struggling for a breath of air and all you can hear are those horrid

words ringing in your ears until

Anger

Rage

Violence

Depression

Suicide.

Locked into an ever declining spiral because you couldn’t tell the effect someone else’s words had on you.

Your own ignorance distanced you and now

You can’t find a way back.

But

Words can also heal.

When someone reaches out and pulls you out of the ocean of your own emotions,

When they drag you back to the light of day and say

            “You aren’t ugly,

            You aren’t worthless.

            You are beautiful

            And you are smart.”

You can come back from that abyss and find your way home.

Words hurt,

But words can also heal.

Words are important.

Don’t forget that.

Words are a Tool

Words are a Tool

2/27/11

My sister who does not share my blood

Lost her father one cold and empty February.

It may have been only a year so,

But since then, it’s been an eternity.

The one thing I noticed on those lonesome days,

Were the certain words people chose to say,

They caused me great frustration

Because there was no feeling in any way.

“I’m sorry,” people muttered quietly

While my friend stared out at the cold.

That phrasing has been used so often,

From the young, and by the old.

Some days later, I brought this up

Wondering what she thought,

“Why must people always apologize

When they share no blame for what’s been wrought?”

She replied, “It’s just what people say,

When they don’t know what words to use.”

“But that really doesn’t make much sense,”

I aggressively accused.

“If you’re always using words that way

They eventually lose what they mean,

The feeling is lost by frequent use,

I’ve learned this from what I’ve seen.”

Lightly tipping her head to the side,

With my heartfelt words she did agree.

Without much thought, words cease to feel

And this I don’t understand, why others can’t see.

“I promise,” “I wish,” “I’m sorry,”

“It isn’t all that bad.”

Constantly used, consistently ignored,

And there are many more to add.

Words are tools with special meanings

That contribute to who we are,

But if we keep using them like we do,

We won’t go very far.

Words and Knowledge

Words and Knowledge

5/17/2013

Words scrawled in Black ink across a sheet of pristine paper.

But without Knowledge, the scrawls of Black ink

            Mean nothing.

Without Knowledge, all these words are, are

            Black scrawls.

Black scrawls scribbled haplessly across a page

            Of pristine, white, paper.

A mess of Black ink that without the correct Knowledge

            Is illegible.

Without Knowledge, words mean nothing.

But without words, how do we communicate our Knowledge?

Words are essential.

But are words Knowledge?

I do not know.

What's In a Name?

What’s In a Name?

12/9/10

What does it mean

When you say something’s name?

Is that what it is?

Are they one and the same?

If that is true

Then is a flower a rose,

A plant, a vegetable,

And are all birds crows?

Does that mean if you call me a demon

That is what I am?

Or just because you say it,

Does that make me one of God’s lambs?

How do you know

What something truly was?

If you can’t see it

And you don’t know what it does?

A name doesn’t define you

And may not be true,

But people still believe it

And cannot get a clue.

A demon may not be a demon,

A song may not be sung,

An adult may be a child,

And a whip might be a tongue.

Just because we say it

Doesn’t make it so,

But words still are powerful,

And this is something I know.

Even if it isn’t true

Those words can still sting,

Sometimes you can’t ignore it

And keep living like a king.

So be careful what you say

Because a word’s a powerful thing.

But what’s in a name?

What harm can it bring?

Lost Meaning

Lost Meaning  

4/12/10

Have you ever deigned to realize

When people say I’m sorry,

For the most part you ignore it

No matter what their worry.

What is the reason for this?

Every word loses its meaning

When it’s so often repeated

Causing others to ignore its feeling.

When you often apologize

For something not your fault,

It causes others to ignore it

For it’s a word used as a default.

This isn’t just true with I’m sorry

But with other phrases as well,

If you constantly hear I love you,

When they mean it, you can’t truly tell.

If you repeat a word

Only about a dozen times,

It quickly loses its meaning,

Go ahead and give it a try.

Quiet, quiet, quiet, quiet

Quiet, quiet, quiet, quiet,

Quiet, quiet, quiet, quiet,

Now doesn’t it look funny?

I never truly realized this

Until it was pointed out,

These words were quietly spoken

Because there was no need to shout.

When I was told her father died,

My fist response was, “I’m sorry.”

She cocked her head and asked me why,

So I responded, “I guess because I’m worried.”

“I feel  really sad

Because your father died.”

She said, “It’s not your fault,

There’s no reason to apologize.”

It was then that I realized,

I simply brush it away,

When people constantly apologize,

And I continue on my way.

 I also quickly realized

That I often do the same,

I constantly apologize

Even though I’m not to blame.

So the next time someone tells you

That something bad has happened,

Your reaction should not be to apologize,

Because there isn’t really a reason.

I beg you to find another way

To show you feel sympathy,

Or all your words, as well as others

Could eventually lose their meaning.